normal To My Nameless Aguaran Neighbor

04 Dec 2013 15:27 - 04 Dec 2013 23:51 #1 by Keith_Stratton (Keith_Stratton)
To My Nameless Aguaran Neighbor was created by Keith_Stratton (Keith_Stratton)
To he who hides behind unsigned paper,

You scum. You bastard. Your father’s line wants for manhood. Your mother mourns the day you spilled from her womb. Dogs flee at your approach. Your horse prays for death with every sunrise.

You raven starver. You orc scut. Hunchbacks pity you. Lepers wish luck to you. Goat sphincters pucker at your passing. Crows find your flesh unpalatable. Your courage has the firmness of fresh butter. Boiled prunes are more stalwart than you. A rock holds more wit.

Shame follows you as might a cloud of flies. A weasel is not blessed with your perfidity. Rats envy your scuttling nature. Snakes aspire to one day speak with your forked tongue.

You soft headed lout. You smooth palmed boy. My wife’s tits are more intimidating than you. Her stays lend more support to a cause than your petulant whining. A slow witted sheep could be your master within a five minute conversation. A dead fish has more character. My morning toast has more backbone.

You coward. You fool. Your existence offends me. Lift my kilt and kiss my ass.

YH&OS,
Cyric McKraegar

(Should you find any of these words difficult to pronounce, I will happily conduct a public recital at first opportunity. Please introduce yourself to me, though I request you bring your own copy)

Cyric McKraegar
Last edit: 04 Dec 2013 23:51 by Keith_Stratton (Keith_Stratton).
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04 Dec 2013 15:37 #2 by Nadia (ChristineR)
Replied by Nadia (ChristineR) on topic To My Nameless Aguaran Neighbor
With insults like that, I sure hope you plan on killing whoever is behind the unsigned paper.
Otherwise this will all be a little anti-climatic.

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04 Dec 2013 23:44 #3 by Alexandre Blythewood (Eleventh Phoenix)
Replied by Alexandre Blythewood (Eleventh Phoenix) on topic To My Nameless Aguaran Neighbor
Whether or not you agree with the sentiment, you must admire the presentation. Rarely have I seen an insult with such complete construction, such parallel structure, and such biting vitriol.

Cyric, should you ever wish to learn the ways of the bard, please seek me out.

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04 Dec 2013 23:46 #4 by Grimkjell Eirson (BillHannings)
Replied by Grimkjell Eirson (BillHannings) on topic To My Nameless Aguaran Neighbor
Hjolda! It was worthy of a skald, I must agree with Tobar.

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05 Dec 2013 09:42 #5 by Razael Seiryn (Razael Seiryn)
Replied by Razael Seiryn (Razael Seiryn) on topic To My Nameless Aguaran Neighbor
To my loving admirer,

Sweet Agaura, I have never been more flattered in my life. To think such a small oversight could cause such hatred and angst. This town truly is a welcoming place. I welcome to you to dine on my tab, drinks on me, and perhaps you can teach me how to properly Insult my opponents. I will pay any price for your lessons. I want to know you. We should drink heartily into the night then partake of the finest fisticuffs this side of the rift.

The not so Nameless Agauran Neighbor,

Razael Seiryn

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05 Dec 2013 10:06 #6 by Rowan Uidhir (Teresa)
Replied by Rowan Uidhir (Teresa) on topic To My Nameless Aguaran Neighbor
*NOT ROWAN*

Razael,

You sweet, kind friend. I think it is lovely that you would pay for someone's food and provide some entertainment for Mister McKraegar. It is rare that such hospitality and strong friendship is shown in these times of trouble. Yes, this town is truly a welcoming place, but only as long as gregarious and light-hearted folk like yourself offer to treat their friends to dinner, drinks, and merry company. Here, I was beginning to worry that a gentleman like yourself would never enjoy the fine acquaintance of fellow towns-members with the comments said about you and your counterparts. I wish you an absolutely lovely day. Also, your penmanship is absolutely beautiful.

F. Sinclair

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05 Dec 2013 12:28 - 05 Dec 2013 12:28 #7 by Keith_Stratton (Keith_Stratton)
Replied by Keith_Stratton (Keith_Stratton) on topic To My Nameless Aguaran Neighbor
Your thoughts opined, your voice has whined
Of all you have tell
The case you plead reveals the love you need
O poor little Razael

Your mother swore she birthed a bore
You possess a certain smell
It upsets the sheep, leads maidens to weep
At the presence of Razael

You assert your rights, you lament your plight
You stand proud of your hold in Hell
We will never know how you will go
You sweet boy, Razael

Cork and paper will delay the maker
From meeting your soul, and well,
Only once do heroes die, with a satisfied sigh
But not you, o Razael.

Pages could be written of how desperately smitten
I am with ringing your bell
But no more shall I write, no more I shall bite
Because there is no clean rhyme with Seiryn.

YH&OS,
Cyric McKraegar

Cyric McKraegar
Last edit: 05 Dec 2013 12:28 by Keith_Stratton (Keith_Stratton).
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05 Dec 2013 12:52 #8 by Elric_Ashby (Elric_Ashby)
Replied by Elric_Ashby (Elric_Ashby) on topic To My Nameless Aguaran Neighbor
*NOT ELRIC*

I have to admit, while the Gadje are always at each other's throats when it comes to their gods, I never expected it to spill into poetry.

You both have my applause. Now please stop putting these poems up, I have patients to get back to.

Dr. Viktor Solvei

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05 Dec 2013 13:04 #9 by Keith_Stratton (Keith_Stratton)
Replied by Keith_Stratton (Keith_Stratton) on topic To My Nameless Aguaran Neighbor
Doctor,

Then stop reading them dingus.

YH&OS,
Cyric McKraegar

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05 Dec 2013 13:12 - 05 Dec 2013 13:12 #10 by Jack (Keeperofdice)
Replied by Jack (Keeperofdice) on topic To My Nameless Aguaran Neighbor
These venomous words will only sow discord with potential allies that the king himself extended the proverbial olive branch to. Unless another noble sees fit to allow this discussion to continue. This matter is considered closed.

Ser Jack Siefer
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05 Dec 2013 13:59 #11 by Elric_Ashby (Elric_Ashby)
Replied by Elric_Ashby (Elric_Ashby) on topic To My Nameless Aguaran Neighbor
Cyric,

What can I say, I enjoy poetry, and am easily distracted.

It has also been quite some time since I have been called a Dingus, I do enjoy that insult.

Sincerely,
Dr. Solvei.

P.S. I am now heading back to my patients.

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05 Dec 2013 14:18 - 05 Dec 2013 14:24 #12 by Razael Seiryn (Razael Seiryn)
Replied by Razael Seiryn (Razael Seiryn) on topic To My Nameless Aguaran Neighbor
To my adoring Celts,

A Knight has stepped in to end this wonderful rabblerousing; yet his posting was removed and the transgressions against my Church and my character have been allowed to continue when the postings in my favor have been locked by a Baronial Knight. Freedom of Religion clearly is having some issues in logistics. That's unfortunate.

However, this level of hate and distrust has moved me. I have a proposition for you. You will continue poetry and I will publish it. I will pass it amongst my congregation and we will hold a place of honor for you amongst our next mass. If you participate for every poem you donate I will donate a stipend to the 'Save the Highlands' fund.

Every poem you write, every complaint you make, every insult you throw only brings attention to me and my cause. I welcome the conflict, your suffering is delicious, and the darkness grows in every passing moment. I want to meet you, sir. Let us drink and discuss how much you fear the dark days ahead.

Future Savior of the Highlands,

Razael Seiryn

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Last edit: 05 Dec 2013 14:24 by Razael Seiryn (Razael Seiryn).
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05 Dec 2013 14:37 - 05 Dec 2013 14:42 #13 by Keith_Stratton (Keith_Stratton)
Replied by Keith_Stratton (Keith_Stratton) on topic To My Nameless Aguaran Neighbor
Esteemed muse,

I accept your offer. Please forward details of your next service by post. I will bring copies and prepare a public reading. All donations should be directed through Brigetta Drexel.

YH&OS,

Cyric McKraegar

P.S. you remain a bastard cur, your false bravado inspires pity, and your handwriting strikes me as limp wristed and effeminate.

Cyric McKraegar
Last edit: 05 Dec 2013 14:42 by Keith_Stratton (Keith_Stratton).

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05 Dec 2013 14:54 - 05 Dec 2013 15:02 #14 by Gabrian Grottings (E.B)
Replied by Gabrian Grottings (E.B) on topic To My Nameless Aguaran Neighbor
Raspberry and Mr. McKraegar,

I don't understand the gods. I will neither show support or denounce the King's decision concerning the clergy. I will however uphold his law. While you are allowed to practice whatever religion you choose at this time, settle your differences in a private manner.

Sincerely,
Bolton DuMourne


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Last edit: 05 Dec 2013 15:02 by Gabrian Grottings (E.B).

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05 Dec 2013 14:56 #15 by Dame Clytie Silverfang (itsgonnabemay)
Replied by Dame Clytie Silverfang (itsgonnabemay) on topic To My Nameless Aguaran Neighbor
Allow me a moment upon my literary soapbox.

This is the thinking that brought me to Travance. It isn't what drew me here, but pushed me away from the rest of the world. I've been spat upon, beaten, and imprisoned alongside wild mages, drow, and worshippers of the dark pantheons. I've heard and shared stories of both this oppression, and the lighter days before we discovered that the world seemingly hated us for what we were. I am no Aguaran, but so long as violence is not taken out upon me by their hand, I see no reason for quarreling.

Travance was safe enough with Lord Fallow roaming about, with Unseelie ravaging our land, even while Xualla and his horde wreaked havoc upon Arawyn. This sentiment, however, has me fearing for my life. The stigmas growing against the dark pantheon will only grow if appeased, and the day where I am treated in the same manner will follow. I only aim to fight against the threats to all of our lives, not a frightened mindless mob of neighbors.

I will give this land and it's people the benefit of a doubt for but two feasts. If things get worse, I shall rally myself against the fear and hatred at the cost of my life. If this doesn't work, I may simply rally to find a new land to call home with those who wish to have the atmosphere of Travance back.

Actions have consequences. Don't forget that, any of you.

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05 Dec 2013 15:30 - 05 Dec 2013 15:31 #16 by Razael Seiryn (Razael Seiryn)
Replied by Razael Seiryn (Razael Seiryn) on topic To My Nameless Aguaran Neighbor
To others who have chosen to involve themselves in the affairs of myself and others; Positive or Negative, a Knight has stepped in and declared an end to this conversation. I politely pointed that out in my last posting. I attempted to resolve the situation with more than generous bribe, I'll call it what it is and it was accepted.

The message has been resolved, received, and posted for publicity. The conflict will not cease because like it or not, this conflict is real, and is happening. People should for now take the time to enjoy the fact that we have survived and defeated Xualla, and now we are all trying to get by this arduous time. Everyone needs to chip in and participate including myself toward keeping things together. The first step is to listen to the Knights.

Surprisingly the Voice of Reason,

Razael "Razbury" Seiryn

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Last edit: 05 Dec 2013 15:31 by Razael Seiryn (Razael Seiryn).
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05 Dec 2013 17:39 #17 by Biron Uidhir (Eddie Colon)
Replied by Biron Uidhir (Eddie Colon) on topic To My Nameless Aguaran Neighbor
Lads and lassies,

Unless you all lack the capacity to read, I believe Sir Cypher ordered this conversation to an end. I won't beat around the proverbial bush. Heed his words, immediately. The next to post shall be fined upon return to the proper.

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05 Dec 2013 22:13 #18 by ColinMcKraegar (ColinMcKraegar)
Replied by ColinMcKraegar (ColinMcKraegar) on topic To My Nameless Aguaran Neighbor
Consider the matter reopened. All shall speak as they feel need to lest these hatreds be held in shadow to fester. Let them come to light where they belong. Where there is chance for peace and redemption.

To those who follow darkness, your days are numbered should you choose to not repent. Do not seek to hide behind law as what is good. Man is fallible, as is his word. The teachings of the light are not. Twist words and deceive, and you shall find my blade twisted within you.

In service to the light,
Sir Colin McKraegar
Knight of Kaladonia
Member of the Order of the White Fox

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05 Dec 2013 22:21 #19 by McDermitt (Matt Quagz)
Replied by McDermitt (Matt Quagz) on topic To My Nameless Aguaran Neighbor
Sir McKraegar

With all respect I in fact ended this conversation, And I intend to keep it that way. Unless a noble who stands above me on the
hierarchy deems it so this conversation is over!

Sir Slack McDermitt the Boar
Knight of Travance
Steward of Valdalis
Master of the Mages' Guild






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06 Dec 2013 01:59 - 06 Dec 2013 02:06 #20 by Akira Saralonde (katemariexo)
Replied by Akira Saralonde (katemariexo) on topic To My Nameless Aguaran Neighbor
Forgive me, since I'm relatively new to Travance if this is not my place to say but if the persons worshipping a, as you say 'evil' God are not causing you any harm, nor have they ever intended you harm, why treat them this way?
My people bear a great hatred for the dark elves, so much so they attack them on sight. I've never even laid eyes upon one of you until my arrival in Travance and when I did, my instincts and what I've been taught made me feel uneasy. however I personally bear no ill feelings to those in Travance. Which is not to say I go out of my way to get to know them, and I apologize sincerely for that.
Great triumph has happened upon our soil as of recent, as well as the tragic deaths of too many of our heroes. Our homelands were destroyed, our loved ones taken from us. I propose that along with the dawning of the new era, a new era of tolerance.
I'll start the notion here, any of my dark elf neighbors that have interest in starting fresh and keeping peace, I invite you for a drink. I would love to sit and get to know you as a person and not what history and collective belief has taught me.

Signed,
Akira Saralonde

*oog sorry for the edits, cracked phone screen is crappy :/ *

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Last edit: 06 Dec 2013 02:06 by Akira Saralonde (katemariexo).

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06 Dec 2013 02:03 - 06 Dec 2013 02:05 #21 by Alexandre Blythewood (Eleventh Phoenix)
Replied by Alexandre Blythewood (Eleventh Phoenix) on topic To My Nameless Aguaran Neighbor
Akira,

A knight of Travance has ordered this topic closed.

Do not post an apology. Do not post an explanation. The wisest course is to post nothing.

-Alexandre Blythewood

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Last edit: 06 Dec 2013 02:05 by Alexandre Blythewood (Eleventh Phoenix).
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