Rumors for September, 1209
"Have you been reading these crazy news posts on the inn wall? No? That's right, you can't read."
"I heard some weird chanting in the middle of the night. Couldn't make heads or tails of it but I slept under my bed to be on the safe side."
"Did ya hear Whitey went missing? The search party found some human bones with teeth marks in 'em. Must be them damn ogres!"
"That's right, he's selling 12 gold pies again. And this time they're smaller? What's wrong with him?"
"I heard absinthe clears the sinuses, puts hair on your chest AND lets you meet the green fairy. Who wouldn't want to drink that stuff?"
"I put my hand in that rock not five minutes before Jasper did. I didn't get stung like he did. Why are there scorpions out here anyway?"
"I saw Zahir working the forge, and he asked a farmer if he knew the riddle of steel..."
"I heard many tales of Drow about last feast. Make sure not to travel alone."
"Without Lord Renaudierre to keep him at bay, I worry that Fallow will show his face again soon."
*glug glug* "Hmmm... does this taste like poison to you?"
"My daughters were taking a dip in the lake when one of them cut their foot on a weird rock. We tossed it out in the middle so nobody else gets hurt."
"No... Come to think of it , they didnt have a banner I recognized. Whoever they are, those dead-men didn't have a chance! Valos be praised!"
"Pah! Ive lost my favorite quill! Have you seen it?"
"Those drums are driving me mad! I cant hear myself think!... Food smells good though..."
"It wasn't Sir Wrathchild - er - Von Ritter... whatever. Sure did move like him though."
"Father Edwin has been locked up in his Academy all month! What a lazy old coot!"
"He skinned my sheep! Someone might have told him you can get the wool without making such a bloody mess!"
"Water seems fine now... What'ya mean I look green?"
"I swear it was a ghost, all pale and dressed in rags! It came to my farm a moanin and a groaning so I sicked rascal on it and it fled into the woods..."
"Oh its just a stab in the dark...which is what your going to get unless you stop asking so many questions!"
"Filthy drow! Why won't the elves just exterminate them and be done with it all ready!"
"Did you hear what those two jerks from Allisandria did the other day? I'm just shocked that their Lord allows them to be on such short leashes. Something needs to be done!"
"Wait... did that lawn ornament just move? Hey wait... I thought I had only two statues. Where did that other one come from? Maybe it's an early birthday gift from my wife. She's so good to me."
"My wife is going to kill me! Why did I blow all our gold playing blackjack?! I sure hope I get a chance to win it back. Maybe I'll tell her I was robbed..."
"I was taking a stroll through Pendarvin a week ago, and I got lost. After wandering for a while, I saw a hobgoblin having a conversation with an enormous man wearing lots of fur. I wonder what common interests they could possibly have..."
"What in the gods' names is a Nex Necis?"
"Hahaha, he's watching me, he's watching us all, he's watching watching watching. Something fancy, he wants it back. It's his his his his his. Where did it where is who has it? Give it back, give it back, it's not yours and it's his give it back. Follow these instructions to the J..."
"He were breathin' kinda funny, but he looked happy, so I didn't worry."
"Oh it's been grand! Married ten years now and the Baron's Feast be right on our anniversery, what a treat!"
"After all these years of livin' in fear, I stopped worryin' 'bout the other shoe dropping and things are finally looking up. Bumper crop commin' in, animals are safe, even started tanning some leather to make a little extra coin on the side. Yes sir, looks like things are finally looking up!"
"...has to be the biggest load of tosh I ever 'eard! Whot kinda vampire don't need ta drink blood to get his jollies, I ask you!"
"I heard some braggart talking about how much he's worth. Saw him throwing around a fine bit of coin, too. Said he'd told his mates he was set to share the wealth. Fine thing to do, sharing one's fortune with others, lets people know they're appreciated, it does."
"Well let's see how well they'll enjoy their feasts this winter without any food! Every year it just gets worse, and all they can think about is their coinpurses, it's not their stomachs they think about until they're hungry. You'd think that with all they eat, that'd be more often!"
"Look, all he said was, 'Soon, soon, it will all come together!' No I don't know what it means! When I asked, he just started laughing like a madman!"
"I'm telling you, stay away from that tavern! No good comes of that place! Why, you're likely to be blown to pieces by some drunkard the moment you walk in the door."
"I'm telling you, Farmer Kittridge said they were as big as he was. Maybe he needs to hire a Jaxuarian to get rid of them? I wonder if that's a delicacy to them."
"One of my mates is a scout for the Baronial Guard. He said some strange human like fire elemental has been terrorizing folks just in the hills outside the proper.... darn frightening if you ask me. Bring a bucket of water on your next caravan...."
"Some poor merchant tried to sell me a treasure map for 100 gold. He must think the trails of Travnace are lined with gold... crazy old coot. I wonder if there really was any treasure there though....."